Heard on trains

I know people come here to read mathematics, but I can’t resist the occasional distraction.

  • The next station is oval.
  • The next station is sandy.
  • The next station is made of ale.
  • The next station is whopping.
  • The next station is where? … This is where!

I have often hoped to hear “The next station will turn ’em green”, but they always use a different verb.

And, of course, there is the old favourite: “The barking train is on Platform 1 …”

About Peter Cameron

I count all the things that need to be counted.
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4 Responses to Heard on trains

  1. James Martin says:

    I’ll never hear Maida Vale the same again! The line from Reading to Waterloo has lots of great names – including Winnersh Triangle and Martins Heron – but I particularly like, before the very first stop: “The next station is early…. This is early”. Must be a helpful boost for their punctuality statistics.

  2. Here is another one from SWT territory. It’s not as good as James’, since you have to imagine that the announcement was going to say more but got cut off: “The next station is greatly …”

  3. A couple more which sound like the aftermath of disasters:
    “The next station is ash” (there’s been a fire)
    “The next station is eely” (there’s been a flood)

  4. “The next station is bushy”. (It is!)

    This was heard on the way to my grandson’s birthday party yesterday. Also, we saw a sign at one of the stations on that line saying “Emergency Gap Jumper”. My partner remarked that she had one of those, from a time when the airline lost her luggage and there wasn’t much choice of clothes shops in the neighbourhood.

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